I've been thinking in depth on this subject for a while now... Something that has always bothered me, a simple thought that somehow seems to escape the majority. I've heard lots of sayings similar to "you get more flies with honey than with vinegar" or "treat others as you want to be treated" and even that the most important of all the Bible commandments is "Love God with all your heart, soul & mind" and that the second most important is like it "Love other people in the same way you love yourself, favor them, be kind..." (Suzie-K paraphrase Matthew 22:35-39 & Mark 12:28-31)
I heard a story about a university student long ago who I believe was an exchange student. There was a girl in her class who went out of her way to make her feel at home so to speak, befriending her and just being kind. Once a relationship was formed the exchange student came to church and gave her life to Jesus. When she was asked what happened to her she said her friend built a bridge to her heart through her kindness and friendship and one day she crossed that bridge and found Jesus on the other side.
Think with me for just a moment, can you learn from someone who makes you feel stupid? Of course not, if someone is making you feel stupid you will not believe they are actually trying to help you and whether they are correct or not your mind automatically shuts the door to their influence. You may be capable of learning quickly and you may even have the desire to learn but if the knowledge is not being presented in a kind manner you will not accept the help.
Another thing to think about are some of your good life changing moments... The people you remember fondly... Why did those moments change you and what is it you remember those people for? I would venture a guess that most, if not all, your answers revolve around kindness. Some of my most treasured memories are of simple things really, people just taking a couple of minutes out of life to ask howw my life is, to send me a note or to just tell me they may not understand what I'm going through but they will pray with me through it... Those people who just believed in me and encouraged me... And those people became the most influencial people in my life. Knowing that, I would be crazy not to strive to be that person to someone else.
So, here's my point: simple as it is, kindness and love are keys. I think the reason God said loving people is so important is because without that kind of love for others you cannot make an impact on anyone's life for God. Jesus knew and was trying to teach us love and kindness are the only keys that will open the door of influence. If you are not kind and loving to the people around you a relationship will never be built. And if you're not building a relationship with people you have no influence over them which means you will never be able to build that bridge toward God. Our job is to build bridges of relationship, love and kindness and it's their choice to cross it and find relationship with God. If we do not build on kindness and love there is no way for those people to get across the divide. If you want to help people you MUST do it out of love, kindness and compassion not pride, harshness and judgement. Be kind, encourage, believe in someone, pass a note along, take a couple of minutes away from your self-absorbed life and give them to someone else.
Unfortunately love and kindness cannot be faked, at least not well... And trying to fake it only hinders others so please, please don't try. We've all been around those people who faine kindness when we know their hearts are black, it's easy to tell... But if you are having a problem loving people or just one person even, take some time, recognize it instead of denying it. Admit it to yourself and God and decide if that's something you're proud of yourself for... I'm sure it's not. I've been there, some people are just hard to love, for me at least haha! But the thing about it is, I want to be kind and loving no matter what and I want that kindness and love to be sincere. There's only one way to get that, go to the God of love... Ask God to help you love people, see them like he does even when they are at their worst and ask Him to give you a compassionate heart. I've prayed that prayer for many years now, it's something I will likely never stop praying over myself. I don't want to lose my sensitivity to others and there are areas I still lack it in that I need to work on. All in all, if you ask God to change your heart take out the dark, cold and judgemental areas He will and He will love that you finally "get it" and more than that, you "want it."
So, go on, build a bridge with kindness and watch the influence you gain in bringing that person closer to God!
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