I'm strong, I'm stable, I've got my own career and money, I've got my own home, my own vehicle, puppy & kitty, I'm involved in my church within a few different ministries with dreams of much more... I've done pretty well at "ruling" my own life with direction from God but there's one thing I don't want... To be your ruler! I mean, don't get me wrong, I will not be ruled by you either. I want you to listen to what I have to say, you better listen... I want you to be strong, stable, have your own career & money, home - or at least pay rent, no furniture box living thank you,- vehicle - okay, if you're totally into it for the health benefits bicycle, ha! - pet(s) - this one actually isn't required but it will make me like you more, - relationship with God and involvement in your local church - if not, you're never going to understand me, - dreams... And I want to pile all of mine and your's together but I don't want to rule you, whoever you are.
Yes, call me "queen bee" if you want to, even treat me like your queen but don't expect me to rule... It's a partnership, and not of two, of three. You, me and Jesus. You see, I'm capable of ruling, that's not the issue, but I do not desire to rule you. I can be a leader in a home when you need me, but please, you be the primary leader. I do have my own relationship with God but I want your relationship with Him to inspire me into closer relationship, I want you to read scripture with me, pray with me and fast with me.
Listen, this isn't just for my future man, I've had many discussions this fall with other ladies who feel the same way... Yes, we like equality, we like the vote, we are independent but we still want a man, not a child. We are not going to chase one down; really, if we have to do the chasing that pretty much tells us you can't be the man we are looking for anyway. No matter how much we think there is potential, no matter how hot we think you are, we are most likely not going to approach you... Yes, we will find every person we know and chat with them before we leave hoping you will come to us but if you don't we will just walk out and not look up... Even when we talk ourselves up before seeing you "okay, I'm going to make eye contact and hold it and flash my prettiest smile this time... I can do this... It's nothing... I can..." we usually won't follow through, after all, we don't need a man and we must not look desperate, because no matter how liberated we are, we still get talked about if we go after a man. So, between the fear of being talked about, the old fashioned dreams of a guy actually walking up to us to talk (how unimaginable that a free woman would still want that, right?) and the knowledge that if a man can't buck up and approach us first he's probably not a man yet anyway, we just act shy... Funny? Yes. Sad? yes. Reality of really great ladies? Definitely.
Listen, insecurities plague us all but let me give you one more inside scoop to help you out... We don't want the whole world... Women know our own flaws and don't expect perfection from men. I know some people say we do because our expectations are driven up by fairy tales, romance novels and movies but that's not entirely true... We know we don't have a fairy godmother, we know you're most likely not going to look like Fabio with your shirt off (and you better not have the same hair do) and we understand there's not really going to be an angel choir following us around every time we see you... But we do expect the same respect as we see and read, we do want to be loved by you and we do want you to have confidence enough to show us you like us... What are we really looking for in a man? Goodness, that's really what matters, if you're nice to people (even the incompetent waiter...) if you care for your family and if you help a stranger... It's not a lot, it's not difficult and ANYONE can be what we are looking for... Most women aren't specifically looking so much at the package the good heart comes in, they're just after the heart.
I'm not sure why I'm writing this really, I suppose partially hoping my future buck will read it and approach me but mostly because now I know that there are lots of amazing ladies out there just like me that deserve some of you amazing Christian men to put your big boy pants on and say "hello..." I mean seriously, it's not that difficult guys, it only takes one sentence to start... I know it can be scary, no one, not even a big, strong man wants to face rejection, but this isn't junior high anymore either, and if a girl snubs you or laughs with her friends when you walk away, she's just that a girl stuck in junior high actions and you want a lady anyway, right? And if you're confused on that answer it was rhetorical anyway, you do want a lady, you want someone who is kind, who can support you when you need someone, who can encourage you and help you go after your dreams... Trust me, I was a girl for a long time before becoming a woman... You want a lady and if you're stumped, ask me, I know lots of wonderful ladies in a lot of places who are ready to meet a good man! ha!
I know this is not my usual type of post but sometimes I really think this sort of thing is necessary and this is one of those times. So back to normal next week (maybe! ha!) and in the meantime share this with any man you know who is single, trust me, he needs it <3 br="">
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