Run or Trust? This is it!

A few years ago I had a breakdown in one of my most cherished relationships... And not just a breakdown that ended with a parting of ways but where that person spoke poorly of me to anyone who would listen afterward.  The worst part was that people all around us believed them because they were the first to speak... Some people turned against me, I had very hurtful words spoken to me and over my future but I couldn't defend myself.. Not because I felt what was being said was justified but because my love and care for the other person had not died with the relationship. My pathetic response was "well, I'm sad they said that and disappointed in them but I will never speak a bad word about them because for many years I loved them and I need to honor that now."  Honestly, I just wanted to scream and tell everything I knew about that person to deflect the pain away, I thought about quitting the particular group we were both apart of, I thought of excuses and ways around what I knew was right but I just couldn't do it...

I was taking piano lessons at the time of the relational breakdown and one night instead of learning piano I learned something about God... He cared enough to step into my situation even though I hadn't prayed but just because God cared didn't mean he was going to let me off easy. God - through my teacher- called out on what my problem really was... Some part of me knew what it was all along and that's probably why I wanted to run and not pray about it... Hearing my teacher tell me the real issue wasn't the situation at hand at all but my lack of trust God would take care of it... At the time I didn't have much of a reaction to what was said, I didn't want my teacher to know he was spot on with what he said, but he was. I drove to a park along the river instead of home that night, I sat in my car watching the sun set and I prayed, sort of a "God, he's right, I don't trust you... And I think it's because I've only had myself to trust in relationships for so long that now I don't trust anyone and it's bled into our relationship and I don't know how to get it back. But I want it back so please help me, teach me to trust you, take me step by step and please protect me from the sharp tongues of others during the process."  It was still a difficult road to travel and I wasn't believed for a long time but eventually God not only helped me trust him but helped others see the truth who were brought into the situation through gossip and conversation with the other party. I didn't even realize I was beginning to trust God, one day something else happened with that person/situation and I just I had peace about it, that's when I realized I had peace was because I was just trusting God! I examined myself and the situation and realized that although I had done some wrong (almost every situation takes two) I ultimately was not the cause of the breakdown of relationship and nothing I did wrong would have excused the lies that were being told about me.

In the end, after a lot of prayer, perseverence, deciding not to quit on God over and over again, I actually now have the relationship back, probably not ever what it was but I still have it and that means a lot... In the end, even though the other person attended church and no one had much of a reason to believe me over the other person somehow God revealed truth.  I actually prayed for the other person, I still loved them and didn't want them to experience reprecussions for words I knew were only spoken in anger.

I believe it was God alone who took care of me and defended me... I now know that even His kids fight and he still can and will stand up for the right. Just because the other party involved goes to church or is a christian, is God's kid too, doesn't mean God will give them a free pass... The bible says God corrects his children because he loves us.  But if you're going through something there is a catch to getting God to "work it out for you" you have to be putting your RELATIONSHIP with God ahead of your feelings and make the decision not to back down from your relationship with God for anyone or any feeling... You MUST TRUST GOD! God will honor your efforts.