Somethings Missing: A Sad Christmas Season

I was always the classic case of a "somethings missing" life. I thought I felt alone because I didn't have enough friends... Although, my dad has always been a firm believer of "you only really need one true friend." Once I got all the friends a girl could ask for I realized there was still something missing and thought maybe it was because I needed a boyfriend. Oh how I was mistaken with that one... It only feels worse when they cheat and lie.  Bad experience for the first relationship with a male but once I was past that I still felt lonely. I then decided maybe what was missing was a career; a call center job just was not fulfilling, money isn't everything.  I went to college, became a paralegal and landed a job at a law office...  Honestly, it's not what I thought; I love being a paralegal but still... There's something missing.  My next assumption was I was feeling lonely because my dad left us... Not just my mom, in the eyes of a child dad is leaving the family as a whole... or hole rather.  I worked feverishly at improving my relationship with my dad but even seeing each other every week didn't take that feeling away.  I am a strong believer that pets can fix almost everything and when I first got my pup I was sure he was the answer... But after a couple of months as a fur-baby's mama I realized there was still something missing...  I designed and built my own home something my mama and I were without since dad left when I was 9.  I love being a home owner! All the little things like paying my own mortgage instead of someone else, being able to play music as late and loud as I want or have friends over and laugh until 3 in the morning without worrying about waking the people in the apartment above... But whatever is missing still wasn't there...

But seriously, what else could I have done? I could have gone back to school but I'm not so sure that would help, I mean, I've always thought I would be a good counselor or psychiatrist but then again I'm thinking if someone was in my office every day saying "I just want to kill myself! Life sucks! My mistress is pressuring me to leave my wife, my wife wants another baby. My kids don't sleep through the night and I had to babysit them again last night so my wife could go to the hospital to spend the night with her sister. My Bentley is so hard on gas... And my secretary, ooh that old hag, I hate her! She only works 60 overtime hours a week and I have to be at work an hour a day!" I'm quite sure after the third appointment I would say something along the lines of "listen you idiot, you don't need counsel you need appreciation and morals! Grow up, put your big boy undies on and take responsibility! You have a great life so stop cheating, be a dad not a babysitter and if your Bentley is that hard on gas get a Ford Fiesta! And if you were really going to kill yourself you would do it instead of taking my time up with your belly aching."  I'm also a firm believer in people just needing a reality check these days and getting over ourselves... We don't really have problems comparatively.

Here's the thing... We were all created with "something missing" in our hearts and there is only one thing that will fill that need...  And maybe you should consider that if nothing in this world is filling the empty space and not lasting for more than a season it's because nothing in this world can... Kind of like the old adage "you can't fit a square peg in a round hole..." So what does that mean? There's no help for me? This is depressing, please tell me there's a lesson here and a hope! 

I think C.S. Lewis had hold of something we all need to grasp... There is a hope, something to fill the "something missing" in our lives... It's love!  I know, you've probably already realized that and you've been trying to fill that hole with relationships, alcohol, travel, busyness, babies, sex, work and who knows what else... And now you're thinking, I've had love and still felt horrible!  Now I'm so messed up no one can love me again anyway, even if I did want to try it again... But there is a solution to all of it and if you take a step back with an objective point of view you will see you are loved already and have been all along.

The key to that love actually filling the missing piece? Love Him back... Not just in words but in action... Not just once or twice a week or once a year at Christmas time but every day... Not just realizing God still loved you and saying you love him back but actually forming a day to day relationship and working on it. Something that will really help you in all relationships but especially your relationship with God is realizing it does take work... Work on your part, time and understanding on your part and if that seems like too much for you to do consider what Christ was born to do for you... Die.. And He already has, what else can you really expect from Him? Nothing, but still, He will do more as long as you're working too.

Yes, Christmas makes us all think about God, whether we have a relationship with Him or not... It also seems to magnify that "something missing" feeling and maybe instead of looking at it as a bad thing see it as a sign you've been looking for.  Christmas is a celebration of Christ and a sad time for many, maybe they are sad not because of whatever they think is wrong with life but because they haven't realized the "something missing" in their life is God.... Even if you have entered into a relationship with Christ and still get that feeling, don't worry it's just God reminding you to draw closer. So this Christmas Season take some time out of the frantic preparations and spend it being with the One the season is all about... Make it a date, play some music, write a love note, be quiet together and just soak it up... You'll find that "something missing" feeling will melt away in the warmth of His love.